His Man and His Woman Q&A (Part 2)

It’s been two months since I posted the first of part of this series. I know some of you were anticipating the second entry. Again, there were so many panel questions we weren’t able to answer during our Biblical manhood and womanhood series. This entry is meant to continue that topic.



Question #3:

Hi! It has been said men should step up. Could you expound more on what stepping up is and what it means?

Answer #4:

I have seen single men who are passive. It breaks my heart because I see so much potential in them, but they don’t want to step up. When I say “step up,” it means being more involved in the context of ministry. I want them not to be scared of volunteering, taking a leadership position, and preaching the Gospel if they have to. It also means doing what God wants them to do even if that might result in failure along the way.

For example a lot of men need to share the gospel and disciple other men, they need to obey God’s commission to make disciples and evangelize. They cannot allow their fear of failure to hinder them from building their own DGroup and spreading the Good News.

A lot of men don’t step up because they’re scared of failure. They have to accept the possibility that they might fail along the way. Not that they want to, but as imperfect human beings, we are prone to mistakes. It’s not about making mistakes or failing. It’s how you come back strong that will define your character and leadership.

So men, step up. Don’t be scared to lead, fail, and not know everything before doing so. Be scared of being passive and disobedient to God’s direction in your life.


Question #4:

How do you make sure that your single life is maximized for the Lord?

Answer #4:

Whenever I hear this question, I always think about what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:34.

“…and his interests are divided. The woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband.”

So to maximizing your single life to the Lord is being undivided in your devotion to Him. This means while you’re a single individual, you will make the most out of your time to focus on Him and what He wants you to do. You have the luxury of time, so go and attend as many conferences, seminars, and Bible studies that you can. You are free from serious commitment, so serve God as well. Serve in a ministry. Build your discipleship group. Go to different mission trips. The insight here is: Spend your time on activities that have eternal value.


Question #5:

What if you see your preferences in a girl who goes to the same church (Connect)? How would you respond?

Answer #5:

Don’t be aggressive and carried away by your emotions. First pray, then observe. Observe how that girl serves the Lord, how that girl worships the Lord, how that girl studies God’s word, how that girl relate to other people, and that girl’s lifestyle. In time, combined with prayer and the blessing of your parents, DGroup leader, and other related mentors, look for opportunities to know her more in a group setting (refer to my answer in the first question about group settings).

Then when everything seems to be clear, and you sense this might be the person that God wants you to pursue, ask your mentors what the next steps are. Just ensure that you are covered with lots of prayer and accountability.


Question #6:

How should a godly man respond to a girl that made up a story about him?

Answer #6:

First of all, how did the news come to you? Did you have a friend that said this is happening in their DGroup? Or did you personally see and hear the girl gossiping to her DGroup about you? If you personally saw and heard that happening, you have to confront that individual. You should rebuke the individual in a loving way. You can politely butt in and say, “Pardon me, I overheard your discussion but that is not actually what happened…” Then you explain what actually happen or say the real story. Then ask the person who was telling the wrong story why she is sharing something untrue from what actually happened.

Your objective is not to embarrass her in front of her friends, but to understand her heart and what led her to do this.

But, if this is news you heard from a second- or third-hand source, it may not be wise to confront the individual.  One thing you can do is pray for that person. Another thing you can do is to respond in a godly way. Do not be affected by this gossip since they are sharing a wrong story about you. You know the truth. There’s no need to worry if you really know that you did nothing wrong. Allow your life and your actions to speak the truth. If you do that and you are above reproach, whatever people negatively say about you will not be accepted by others because they’ve seen the real you. Pray and surrender this to the Lord. Allow your godly actions to speak louder than ungodly, untruthful words.



There are a couple of more questions to answer which will be tackled in the third and final entry. Thank you for your patience. Again, if you have anything that you want to share, just leave a comment below. I like hearing from you. God bless!

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His Man and His Woman Q&A (Part 1)

Recently, we concluded our series entitled, “His Man and His Woman.” It was a series talking about Biblical manhood and womanhood. We concluded our series by separating the men from the women and having a Q&A per group.

HIs Man and His Woman

It was really fun to be a panelist and answer questions men have about contemporary relationship issues. We weren’t able to answer all the questions, so I decided to answer them in my blog. I hope everyone finds this information full of insight and wisdom.



Question #1: 

Is it okay to invite a girl to go out? The invitation is to get to know her more.

Answer #1:

I normally advice singles to go out as a group if they want to know more about a specific person. Why? Because in a group setting, the person doesn’t put his or her best foot forward. If it’s an intimate date, of course a person would try to impress. But in a group setting you would most probably know who the person really is – what she likes, dislikes, her good side and bad side as well.

Then, when you get to know the person in a group setting, pray, seek advice from Godly leaders, and if you sense God is leading you to know the person even more, then that’s the time to ask her to go out. Not immediately inviting the person to go out will give you more time to pray and objectively seek what is in your heart. You don’t want to be overcome by your emotions or even let emotions cloud your judgement. For example, if you suddenly invited her out, then during the date you suddenly see something you don’t like. If you decide not to have another date, this might hurt the other party and you don’t want that to happen. You want to protect your sister in Christ.

In a group setting, the person is who she really is and most probably you will see something there you don’t like in the person. Then when you see that, you can now observe if you still want to get to know her beyond platonic friendship….



How do you identify that a person is a potential suitable helper to the calling that God want her to be?

Answer #2:

Let’s first discuss that word “calling” because there are callings that are applicable to everyone, and there is a calling specific to you.

For example, everyone is called to make disciples or everyone is called to serve God. Now, since you are called to make disciples, who would be a suitable helper for you? Most probably it is someone who believes and accepts that she or he is also called to make disciples, too, since it is the calling of every believer. That’s why the Bible tells us not to unequally yolk with unbelievers. So if you want to find a suitable helper or partner,  she should be someone of the same faith.

Now let’s talk about specific calling. This is unique with everyone. For example, let me use my personal situation: My specific calling is to lead the singles ministry of the CCF Alabang. That is unique to me. No one else has been assigned to that role. Now, I should think, based on my specific calling, who is the best partner for me? Most probably it is someone who is also passionate in serving the singles as well. This should be someone who is willing to accept that her family’s life will be open to the public and supports the ministry of her husband. That is why one absolute requirement for me is she should serve in the same ministry as I.

But this is using my situation as an example. That’s why you should pray for God to reveal what He specifically wants you to do in life whether it’s become a pastor,

corporate executive, business man, entrepreneur, philanthropist, etc..

My simple advice regarding the best helper or partner for you is to look for someone who not only loves and serves the Lord Jesus Christ, but also shows Christlikeness in her actions. You’ll never go wrong with a Godly woman.



There are still other questions to be answered. I will tackle them in my next blog post. If you have anything that you want to share just leave a comment below. I would love to hear from you. God bless!

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I can’t believe what the Lord gave me

It’s been a while since I wrote anything in my blog. I have been so busy every since I went full time. For those who are thinking to go full time in the ministry and you’re thinking that this will give you more time for other things – you’re wrong. Well, for me that’s the case.

Ever since I went full time I have been so engaged in the work that the Lord has entrusted to me. This week alone I lead a bible study last Thursday, spoke in a company on Friday, then the following morning I spoke in our fellowship for BPO employees and then another speaking engagement in the evening. It’s been an amazing journey for me. There are ups and downs but I’m just thanking God that He has given me the grace and strength to continue to move forward.

And there’s one thing that I’m really very grateful to God for right now. Despite my busy schedule, He gave me the strength and provision to finish the renovation and furnishing of my condo unit.

Condo Modern Zen Design

When I went full time, I surrendered all of my dreams. There was a big dip in my salary. I surrendered getting married at an early age. I surrendered my dream of being able to buy my own home and a lot of other things. I never really knew what to expect, but there is one thing that I know. I know that the Lord will provide and He will take care of me.

I remember there was a time where I only had Php150 pesos. I even wrote that in my diary. After leading a bible study suddenly a love gift was handed over to me. I didn’t expect that. I’m ok even if they don’t give me one. I’m not doing this for that. I’m doing this because this is what the Lord has tasked me to do and in that moment, I really understood that I do not have to worry. He will provide for me.

The completion of my condo unit is another testimony of God’s goodness in my life. It is a testimony of God’s faithfulness in my family and towards me. I don’t have a big unit, but it’s enough to live on my own and even start a family someday.

I’m writing this to let you know, that if you walk in the path that the Lord has called for you and you have a relationship with Him, He will take care of you. If we know how to give good gifts to our children, how much more our heavenly father?

Do not worry about what tomorrow may bring. Trust in Him. God provides. Learn to walk in obedience. The psalmist was right.

Psalm 34:10

The lions may grow weak and hungry,

but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.

I hope this short post, brought encouragement to your life. I hope to be able to write more in the future. If you have any comment, just write in the box below and I would love to hear from you. May God’s blessing be upon your life!

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